Why do Catholics confess their sins to a priest?

Sacraments are an experience of God’s love. In Reconciliation, we are given the gift of being able to hear the priest offer us God’s forgiveness and the forgiveness of the Church, the Body of Christ. Celebrating this Sacrament requires a careful examination of conscience. This process of examining, which requires us to be honest about what we have done and what we have failed to do, is the first step in knowing and understanding that we are in need of God’s forgiveness.

Can a seven-year-old really sin?

When we view sin from an adult perspective, of course a child’s capacity to sin cannot measure up to what is possible for us. Yet, here is what constitutes sin: that I know what I am doing is wrong (contrary to God’s will) and that I am free to choose. Children are constantly being formed in their understanding of what God wants for us and from us. Yet, as parents you know better than anyone that your child can distinguish between right and wrong. One of the greatest gifts you can give your child is an understanding of the need to examine his or her conscience and the desire to continually grow in understanding God’s will.

If God loves us unconditionally, why do we need to pay so much attention to sin?

In Scripture, one of the things that God reveals to us is that we are made by love, in love, and have the capacity to respond in love. We also learn that we are free to receive or reject God’s love. The consequences of rejection are significant. While God will always continue to love us, we must turn away from sin and receive the forgiveness that Jesus did indeed die in order to give to us. God will not force anything on us, not even his love. If what we desire is communion with God and with others in this world and in eternal life, we need to open ourselves to the mercy of God. That begins with paying attention to what we do or fail to do.

If you can say you are sorry before the moment of your death and be forgiven, isn’t that enough?

Have you ever been the recipient of an insincere apology? Children will often give them when a parent says, “Tell your sister, you are sorry!” The unenthusiastic “sorry” that follows may be filled with attitude and lack sincerity. Everyone involved, especially the other sibling, knows that this is not true contrition. Or maybe your spouse says, “I don’t even know what I did, but I’ll say I’m sorry if you’ll stop giving me the cold shoulder.” A sincere contrition requires knowing that what you have done is wrong. It also requires being truly sorry for the harm and hurt you have caused. While we confess and proclaim the mercy of God, we understand that in order to receive mercy, our hearts must be overflowing with contrition.

What are the chances that someone who has never paid attention to living in right relationship with God and others will come to full and sincere contrition at the end of their life? While all things are possible, it is not likely. And there is always the possibility that we will not have time to even ask for forgiveness. Saint Theresa put it this way: “It’s heaven all the way to heaven, and hell all the way to hell.”

Why is it important for my child to memorize an Act of Contrition?

When we are experiencing anything for the first time, we are often filled with nervousness or anxiety. In these situations, good preparation and the ability to rely on structure can provide us with some comfort and relief. This is especially true for children. While the Rite of Reconciliation allows the penitent to pray this prayer in his or her own words, it is good to have words that we can fall back on to give us confidence and peace. Any Act of Contrition must include an understanding of ourselves as sinful and in need of God’s mercy. It must also include a resolve to try to grow in holiness so as not to continue the same patterns of sin. The Act of Contrition should not be a prayer reserved only for the Sacrament of Penance. Saying the Act of Contrition each evening as part of our nightly prayer is a wonderful reminder of our need for forgiveness. This helps children, as well as adults, to call to mind our responsibility to be mindful of where we are in our journey of faith and what we need in order to grow as disciples of Christ.

If there is a way we can be forgiven as a group, without saying our sins individually, why can’t we just to that?

There are several forms for the Rite of Reconciliation. There is a form to celebrate the Rite that allows penitents to silently say their sins and for the priest to grant general absolution as a sign and symbol of God’s forgiveness. This form of the Rite, however, is only to be used in emergencies, such as on a battlefield or during a natural disaster. Even then, penitents are instructed that their next confession must include a personal confession of sin. Why is speaking our sins so important? The act of naming something out loud has significant implications in our human condition. Did you ever wonder why when people struggling with an addiction gather for meetings to support one another, they begin to speak by saying, “I am Joe and I am an alcoholic (or drug addict)”? They come to the meetings because they have an addiction. By speaking those words out loud, however, they remind themselves that they must remain conscious and bring into the light what they have previously hidden in the darkness. In their admission, they receive the grace to live one day at a time. We speak our sins for that reason—to hold in the light what has been in the darkness and offer these sins to God through the priest. In order to powerfully experience the forgiveness of God, we must first confess our sins with humility. In doing so, we open ourselves to the grace to not repeat these offenses and to live in freedom as children of God.